On Reluctance

On Reluctance

By Dr. Ryan Donlan

Department of Educational Leadership

Bayh College of Education

Indiana State University

… Ah, when to the heart of man

Was it ever less than a treason

To go with the drift of things,

To yield with a grace to reason,

And bow and accept the end

Of a love or a season?

From Robert Frost’s

Reluctance, 1913

Amidst the “big-impact” decisions you make in your life and leadership, consider carefully those more infrequent that can be considered of “long-impact,” ones that will assuredly influence the quality of your life’s journey.  Long-impact decisions trigger deep questioning within ourselves regarding readiness, satisfaction, trepidation, and resolve … about current relationships, past experiences, and future opportunity. 

It is natural for good leaders to be taken aback by the depth of consequence of long-impact decisions and to ask themselves, “Is it time?” “Am I ready?”  “What will happen?”  “Will I regret?”  “What is the impact on others I love?”

Long-impact decisions can be (1) Educational – Enrolling in a Graduate Program … Selecting a Dissertation Chair … Changing a Major, (2) Occupational – Ascending to the Superintendency … Declining a Job Offer … Terminating an Employee, or (3) Personal – Proposing to a Significant Other … Adopting a Child … Scheduling Bariatric Surgery (just a few of the many examples). All could affect one’s leadership; all will change your life.

Long-impact decisions involve myriad variables that substantially increase eustress or distress, and because of such, leaders face naturally occurring feelings of “reluctance” as they address available options that at best, offer complexity amidst ambiguity. Reluctance in leadership is a “dis-inclination,” a lack of desire, a pensiveness or hesitance.  It is one of many barometric readings within us that should deepen our thoughts, as any decisions made on the near end of our life’s journey, positively or negatively impact our quality of life on the far end.

It is never easy and quite true that the ability to handle one’s reluctance toward positive ends varies from leader to leader.  One’s ability to handle reluctance affects the strength of one’s leadership.

How do you handle reluctance?

            A difference exists between those who use reluctance in long-impact decisions to move toward a vista of self-actualization and those who use it to deepen grooves of risk aversion and the status quo. The former harnesses and directs its energy through self-empowerment, moving forward on life’s terrain toward a destination of growth and accomplishment; the latter shies from the surge by metaphorically avoiding eye contact through a veil stitched of complacency and apprehension.

            I cannot offer advice on the decisions leaders should make as they confront situations of long-impact during their tenure, as without contextual detail and an intimate knowledge of circumstance, that would be imprudent.  I can, however, offer a philosophical framework useful for energizing oneself during long-impact decision-making, by turning Frost’s excerpt above into prose, a conversation that I would have with myself – thoughts that have helped me to navigate long-impact decisions for many years.

… Ah, when to the heart of man

Was it ever less than a treason

To go with the drift of things,

(Frost, 1913)

When considering what is really important on our life’s journey, we are committing an injustice against ourselves if we resign that we must accept the initial hand dealt or think that our present circumstance it is all that we deserve or can handle.  Our best leaders are efficacious; they shape, define, and interpret their future; they act not as sheep.

To yield with a grace to reason,

(Frost, 1913)

When considering what is really important on our life’s journey, we are committing an injustice against ourselves when we seek only those futures in which we calculate, to our satisfaction, a cost/benefit analysis before beginning. Our best leaders transcend what others view as customary if they see farther and feel deeper, needing no measurable certainties prior.

And bow and accept the end

Of a love or a season?

(Frost, 1913)

When considering what is really important on our life’s journey, we are committing an injustice against ourselves if we accept that happiness is of finite temporality, or further, if we allow the our satisfaction to plateau by settling for a path of least resistance.  Our best leaders embody the warmth of Irish Proverbs and may even spar a few rounds for an evergreen tomorrow.

On Reluctance, in decisions long-impacting … “Where are you?”

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Dr. Ryan Donlan can be reached at (812) 237-8624 or at ryan.donlan@indstate.edu. Please consider sharing your thoughts, ideas, and perspectives on this Blog at anytime.